Magna Carta

How do they even know that this is the Magna Carta?
It's so hard to read... curse that Olde English.

Oooooh boy, this is a big one to tackle. Now I'm going to say right off the bat that I'm not going to go deeply into the changes to law from the Magna Carta which sounds... well, kind of stupid seeing as how the whole thing is a freaking legal document. What I want to go over is the historical background for the charter, why and how it came to be. I mean, I'm sure a lot of people will tell me (as if anyone reads this blog) that the Magna Carta still changes the justice system today, but to be perfectly honest I don't find that interesting. If you do happen to want to learn the legal ramifications of it, there are plenty of incredibly boring university lectures I suggest you attend.

Anyways...

Pope Innocent III: ranked the fifth most
innocent Pope of all time.

King John was having a rough time in England in 1209(ish). He raised taxes, came into conflict with Pope Innocent III (who, judging by the name, even sounds friendly by pope standards), and had a number of failed wars under his belt, the worst of which occurring in Normandy where losing to the French is always seen as a particularly strong negative. Naturally, there was some unrest that began brooding in the Kingdom, and the barons began to conspire against the crown. If you're wondering, a baron is a noble but a pretty low ranking, chump-esque role. It's above a knight but below a viscount, earl and the other variety of titles that I wish I could refer to myself as. It also makes me wonder if "Viscount Chocula" would have sold better.

So after the barons really got together and grumbled, they went into open rebellion. This isn't in and of itself too big a deal as rebellions were apparently fairly common, as every king after William the Conquerer had to deal with them. William presumedly didn't have to worry about rebellions as people are typically pretty happy when you take over everything for them. What was unusual was the uprising barons had no replacement planned for him as rebellions typically do - the common path is attempting to overthrow the king and throw in a usurper more inclined to help out with the needs of whoever was doing the rebelling. The closest they had was Prince Louis of France, but... he's French. They didn't really want that to happen all that much.

"So if I don't sign you'll kill me, yes?
What fun! I've never been on the
receiving end of a death threat before!"

King John knew this was going on. He tried to delay the confrontation by hiring some mercenaries, making the people pledge a new oath of allegiance and garnering some favour from the Pope (surrendering to the papacy and whatnot and declaring himself a crusader). It didn't help him out very much though, and soon enough the French heir and Alexander II of the Scots entered London with the city opening their gates in support. They forced King John to agree to a document called the "Article of the Barons", after which they renewed their oath to him. This would eventually turn into the Magna Carta. The purpose of the article was to limit the power of the crown; to help enforce it, one rule was that twenty-five barons could meet and overrule the king if he defied the charter. This was a very strong attack on his authority, and the king was not cool with it.

Remembering that King John had just submitted to the papal authority, the Pope declared Magna Carta null and void - keep in mind that back in the day, the church held a lot of political power to say the least, and it was in the Pope's best interest that the new charter did not go through. The barons were barely out the door when their article was cancelled. Seeing no other alternative, civil war raged between the barons and the crown, as the king was quite clearly never about to let himself be bound by the charter, marking the beginning of the First Barons' War. The barons, aided Prince Louis, killed the king in 1216 and secured the future of Magna Carta. The king's nine year old son was crowned king, but much of the rule was under the Frenchman. They chose the king's son as they had some worries that the Prince would leave them worse off than they had been when they started.

So Magna Carta was founded officially. This led to constitutional law for the English speaking countries and was the legal system used for quite some time. While most of its clauses have been since replaced by ones that, you know, aren't several centuries old, it set the tone for how the law was going to be from then on out - less power for the monarchy, and everyone is subject to the law. Huzah!

Not to be confused with the Magma Carta, a much easier bill to warm up to. Ugh... sorry. There are only so many puns you can make about the Magna Carta.

Famous Historical Figures Say the Darndest Things!

1. "The greatest constitutional document of all times - the foundation of the freedom of the individual against the arbitrary authority of the despot." A quote from Lord Denning, whoever that may be. I am quite sure he's a rather big fan of the Magna Carta.
2. "Stand fast for the liberty of the church and the realm." Taken from the Barons' Oath. 
3. "...shameful and demeaning agreement, forced upon the King by violence and fear." Pope Innocent III, expressing his not so found opinion of the document.